Posts Tagged ‘recipe’
The Military Parade
What says, “we respect the Founding Fathers’ vision for a Republic governed by civilians?” What says, “No more kings?” What says, “we have learned the warning lessons history has to offer about militarized societies?” Is it a military parade? No? Well, if you have a small penis and delusions of grandeur, fuck it. Tanks and large…
Read MoreThe Shutdown
So, the Republicans control the federal government, lock, stock, and barrel. (They really like guns.) But, they’re the kind of guys who could manage to fuck up a wet dream, couldn’t hit water if they fell out of a boat, and couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the…
Read MoreThe Corker Kickback
“Hey, how did all this cash get stuck in my pockets? I demand answers!” Bob Corker is shocked,*shocked* by a provision stuck in the Republican tax bill shortly before he conspicuously flipped his vote. But, surely, it’s just a coincidence. After all, if MAGA meant anything, it meant that the economic anxiety of the American…
Read MoreThe Native American Sensitivity Training Cocktail
We know that it’s very difficult to remember how not to offend all of the various people in the world, but after Trump referred to Elizabeth Warren as “Pocahontas” during an event honoring WW2 Native American Veteran Code Talkers, and after Sarah Huckabee Sanders doubled down and said that calling someone Pocahontas isn’t a slur,…
Read MoreThe GOP Tax Scam
Zombie-Eyed Granny Starver, Paul Ryan, and his colleagues in the House passed a tax restructuring bill. So Drunk Publius has a cocktail in tribute to this audacious money grab. Now wait a minute y’all, this drink ain’t for everybody. Only the wealthy* people. So all you rich mothers, get on out there and drink. Drink I…
Read MoreThe Hurt Feelings
Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me “old,” when I would NEVER call him “short and fat?” Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend – and maybe someday that will happen! Donald J. Trump, 45th President of the United States, November 11, 2017 Awww, did the poor president get his…
Read MoreMueller Time
Judging from his rage, Trump is tweeting like a rat in a cage. The Arpaio Pardon, signalling Trump’s willingness to issue unjustified pardons to get his buddies out of trouble, was not enough to deter Robert Swan “Bob” Mueller III. “Bobby Three-Sticks” was director of the FBI from 2001 – 2013, appointed by George W. Bush…
Read MoreThe Me, Myself and Virgin Islands Cocktail
The U. S. Virgin Islands is a magical place with cool breezes, super-extra white sandy beaches and ten hot submissive virgins for every presidential tourist. But the most magical of all the magical things about the Virgin Islands is that the ocean so calm and so clear that you can see almost see your own…
Read MoreThe Rocket Man
In a shocking turn of events, math isn’t the President’s strong suit. Donnie apparently thinks Kim Jong-un has been negotiating with the US for 25 years. What the rest of us didn’t know was that apparently Kim Jong-un has been controlling North Korea’s nuclear arsenal since the ripe young age of 10. The “Fake News”…
Read MoreNambian Covfefe
“Nambia’s health system is increasingly self-sufficient.” – Donald Trump The Nambian Covfefe was brought to America by Nambian Ambassador, Frederick Douglass, who is doing an amazing job. This drink is one of the reasons we’ve been hearing more and more about him lately. (Another reason being, of course, his work with the widows of the Bowling…
Read More