Archive for January 2017
Who knew the National Parks would be the face of the resistance?
After inauguration, I knew there would be protests, fights, and resistance to this president. What I did not see coming was that park rangers would be leading the cause. But in the face of the unimaginable, a new and beautiful thing has arisen. And it’s the Alt National Park Twitter accounts. For anyone in a…
Read MoreThe Going Rogue
Has your new boss suddenly silenced you with a gag order? Are you no longer allowed to communicate with the public? Are you being actively suppressed because you aren’t sharing his “alternative facts”? He’s probably just bitter (much like the campari in this recipe) because he realizes that he doesn’t really have the best tweets…
Read MoreThe Fucking Wall
You may be reading this and thinking, hey, The Wall is a drink in the book already. Yes. Yes it is. But it just wasn’t strong enough, so we’re adding The Fucking Wall. #fuckingwall We find former Mexican Presidente Vicente Fox’s tweets to our new president pretty awesome, and it’s his tweets that inspired this…
Read MoreThe Little Marco
There was some big talk from “Little Marco Rubio.” We thought there might even be a shred of a chance that he was going to pull it out, be a man, and finally assert some dominance after being belittled and humiliated by Trump during the primaries. Rumor had it that he was going to defy Trump…
Read MoreThe Impeachment
With Trump being sworn in right at this very minute, we know you’ll need a drink to help you cope. Here’s our very wishful drink called The Impeachment from page 24 of Cocktails for Survival: Not as trump as you drink I am. Mix it well and set on fire along with your right to choose,…
Read MoreThanks Obama!
Today is President Obama’s last full day in office. He has shown nothing but grace and strength in the face of our nation’s impending doom. In his honor, we present to you our drink called The Thanks Obama (page 27 in Cocktails for Survival). We suggest you make a pitcher of these tonight and raise a…
Read MoreThe Inaugural Drinking Game
The day is almost here. This Friday, Donald Trump will be sworn in as President of the United States. To honor this event, we would like to suggest this Trump Inauguration Drinking Game to help ease the transition. First, grab your copy of Cocktails for Survival: Not as trump as you drink I am and choose…
Read MoreThe Pre-Existing Condition
When we wrote this book, we knew we’d have enough material for a Volume II in 2017. What we did not realize was that we’d have enough material to write new cocktails daily. But here we are. Last night the Senate voted to gut Obamacare (for those of you still unsure, Obamacare is just a…
Read MoreThe Golden Shower
(The puns, they are endless.) In honor of our PEEOTUS, we’ve created a new drink to honor him. Enjoy! The Golden Shower Ooooh you naughty boy! Has your pal Putin got Twitter all atwitter because they have proof that you like a little kink with your hookers? Did you take “trickle down economics” a little…
Read MoreThe Perry
While The Perry seems like the perfect drink to serve our next cocktail party, I just don’t think we have the moves to pull it off. Check out page 36 of Cocktails for Survival: Not as trump as you drink I am to find The Perry. We recommend you don’t attempt this drink unless you have some…
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